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BLIND, STUPID AND DESPERATE
 
Gone but not forgotten:
Les Ferdinand
 
Position: Striker
From: unattached - September 2005
Record: Played: 0(0) Scored: 0
To: ??? - end of association - May 2006
Career stats: Soccerbase
He was: A Watford player. Apparently.

Three things that are NOT considered to be an emergency:

  1. Cats being stuck in trees. Do not dial 999 if your moggie climbs up your horse chestnut.
  2. Running out of green tea bags when you're sitting in a boiling office in dire need of refreshment. You can always walk to the shops.
  3. Playing Francino Francis or Jay DeMerit at centre forward. Hmmmmm…..

If you're reading this in the heady summer of 2006, you'll know that the ex-England striker and next door neighbour to Watford's training ground was signed to cover emergencies, but spent his year on our books sat in the Grandstand studio most Saturday afternoons, babbling away with Graeme Le Saux, Carlton Palmer and Garth Crooks. If it's some future year, yes, it was that Les Ferdinand, and no, it didn't make sense then either.

Oh well, at least he didn't cost so much as a penny. Would have been nice to see him play at least once, though…

Dave Messenger