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BLIND, STUPID AND DESPERATE
 
03/04: Preview: Watford
Census
The results of a survey of 356 Hornets fans

Where will you finish?
Straight up:33
Playoffs:175
Top half:135
Middle:12
Bottom half:1
Going dahn:0

Mean prediction:
6th (10th most Confident Supporters)
(Last Season's Mean Prediction : 9th)

What would the perfect Division One table look like?
(Last season's position in brackets)

	
			UP	DOWN	SCORE
1  (1)	Watford    	-	-	-
2  (11)	Nottm Forest 	110 	10 	100           
----------------------------------------------
3  (-)	West Ham 	136 	42 	94 
4  (-)	Crewe 		87 	6 	81 
5  (3)	Ipswich 	82 	7 	75 
6  (9)	Norwich 	26 	4 	22           
----------------------------------------------
7  (10)	Reading 	32 	11 	21 
8  (12)	Rotherham 	27 	15 	12 
9  (-)	Wigan 		21 	11 	10 
10 (7)	Walsall 	22 	14 	8 
11 (4)	Preston 	11 	4 	7 
12 (14)	Coventry 	7 	16 	-9 
13 (-)	West Brom 	9 	20 	-11 
14 (7)	Gillingham 	15 	30 	-15 
15 (-)	Sunderland 	36 	53 	-17 
16 (6)	Derby 		3 	21 	-18 
17 (18)	Bradford 	3 	22 	-19 
18 (19)	Stoke 		3 	30 	-27 
19 (17)	Sheff Utd 	18 	59 	-41 
20 (21)	Burnley 	3 	106 	-103 
21 (24)	Crystal Palace 	4 	108 	-104           
----------------------------------------------
22 (23)	Millwall 	7 	117 	-110 
23 (20)	Franchise FC 	4 	167 	-163 
24 (-)	Cardiff 	8 	182 	-174

Which Division One player would you most like to sign?
Joe Cole (37% votes)
(Last Season: Wayne Brown)

Who is the club's weakest link?
Gavin Mahon (32% votes)
(Last Season: Patrick Blondeau)

What team should line up on August 9th?

Alec
Chamberlain
Neal
Ardley
Neil
Cox
Marcus
Gayle
Paul
Robinson
Jimmy
Davis
Micah
Hyde
Richard
Johnson
Lee
Cook
  Heidar
Helguson
Danny
Webber
 

Wayne Brown the most popular deputy for the suspended Paul Robinson

There was a late surge towards 4-3-3 which never quite won through. A half-decent bench can be made up of other popular nominees who just missed out... Bruce Dyer (198 votes), Richard Lee (156), Jamie Hand (124) and Lloyd Doyley (119)

Number of different spellings of Heidar Helguson: ridiculous

Watford in Red Shorts or Black Shorts:
38.7% say Red (10th most pro-Red). (Booooo - sulking ed)

Club vs Country:
70.9% say Club (17th most pro-Club)

Who would you vote for as Luton Town Manager?:
Gianluca Vialli (22% of vote)

Other suggestions: A turd on a bungee rope, Bernard Manning, Chris Kamara, Devon White, Dave Bassett, David Furnish, Father Jack Hackett, Gareth Gates, Graham Norton, Ian Atkins, John Gurney, Kerry Dixon, Lennie Lawrence, Margaret Thatcher, Malcolm MacDonald, Marc Waldock, Mick Harford, Mick Harford's dog, Murdock from the A-Team, Noel Edmunds, Ray Wilkins, Roy "Chubby" Brown, Terry Fenwick, La La, Tinky Winky, Zippy from Rainbow

Can you offer one of our editors a job? :
18.4% say Yes (9th most helpful supporters)

Suggestions include:
"helping out in my pet shop, cleaning and feeding the parrots"

"Rowson: Floor sweeper at the production plant making Watford's kit - all those lovely new black shorts passing by. Mmmmmmmm, black shorts" (I know where you live - ed)

"Software Validation Engineer, Basildon, Essex"

"Matt to write the project propsals. Ig to write the post implementation reviews"

"Dave Messenger in my newly owned lap dancing club in Market Street as a lap dancer"

"If I get the dream job I'm applying for you can have mine. I'm not saying what it is though. Ok, it's in publishing"

"However desperate he is, he still wouldn't want it"

"Writer/editor of our extremely boring in-house magazine"

"Lion tamer at a zoo in Singapore - previous guy got eaten - looking for a keen replacement - must like cats"

"Anyone who can answer the phone deal with simple problems and are better looking than a zombie you could all work instead of our current telesales dept"

"Fixing my housemate's light switch. He probably won't pay anything, but there's a cup of tea and a jazz cigarette in it for you..."

Who was your favourite member of the A-Team?
Murdock111
BA78
Hannibal63
Face59

Spelling Test :
51.0% can spell ACCOMMODATION

(10th best spellerers)

2.5% bottled out of answering (14th most cowardly)
12.8% admitted to cheating (4th most openly dishonest)
of whom seven still got the answer wrong

Do you regularly read the Daily Mail :
11.5% confessed to this (11th most Daily Mail supporters)

If you're happy and you know it clap your hands ?
84.6% claim to be happy (3rd happiest supporters)