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03/04: Preview: Coventry City
Opposition opinion
by Ben Nunn of The Sky Blue Superplex

What happened last season?
Before Christmas: A consistent side, defensively-solid but exciting to watch. Hard to beat, got some great results in the bag, and looked set for a play-off place at worst.

After Christmas: A consistent side, losing pretty much every week. Just one league win in over four months, and that was at bottom-club Grimsby courtesy of an own-goal and a penalty! By May we were officially on the worst run in our club's history, and the slide from 4th place to 20th meant our worst finish in 40 years.

At times like these, I find it helps to think of children starving in Africa...

What's going to happen next season?
Knowing our luck, relegation to Division Two.

Sure we've signed Andy Morrell from Wrexham - the top scorer in all four divisions last season - but he'll probably get injured in a pre-season friendly or start firing blanks as soon as he pulls on the Sky Blue.

That's just the way things are at Highfield Road. The sensible supporters long ago gave up any notion of 'optimism' or 'justice'. What will be will be.

Can you recommend a pub for away fans?
Pubs in the immediate vicinity are not friendly, don't like away colours, and you wouldn't want to visit them anyway. Best tip for away fans is the White Friars on Gosford Street, the road from the City Centre to the ground. This is welcoming to all supporters, and unusually for the area has an excellent range of real ales. The Sky Blue Tavern opposite the ground does have an 'away' bar, but it's nothing to write home about and there has been 'trouble' in here in the past.

What's the nearest railway station?
Coventry BR is the nearest and it is a fairly lengthy and complicated walk from there to the ground. Directions can be found on the Sky Blue Superplex CHECK THIS guide to Highfield Road.

Where is the best place to park?
There's a couple of multi-stories on the East End of the City Centre which are within walking distance. Nearer the ground there is very limited street parking and a couple of school car parks etc. but you'll need to snap up the spaces 2-3 hours before kickoff.

Word Association
Coventry City Conspiracy!
Beckham Inarticulate Tosser
Milton Keynes Woohoo, new ground to tick off*
The Premiership Coventry City
Division Two Very Possibly
Mickey Quinn Steak and Kidney
Watford Always f***ing beat us. Bastards.
*or not - ed

Soundbites (from assorted Census correspondents)

"I split up with my bird today and tonight I got a new ace is that? Do you wanta bit of rock? I've got loads"

"I am very overweight and have a spotty bum. I am only overweight because my Dr. said I have a problem with my hands ........ I can't keep them out of the fridge!!!!"

"is this a wind up? am i gonna press SUBMIT and get told to "f*** off"?"

"Yeah staff are very sweaty in this 30+degree heat, Where's the Ice-Cream man gone??? Nice one lads!!!"

"I have no expectations for this season as we are just about managing to scrape a team together and we have too many young lads in the team to offer any serious challenge for promotion"

"Have to agree that Watfords shorts is an important issue. The red white the bright yellow shirts just creates too much glare (even at night games). So it has to be black shorts - tone it down a bit Watford !!"

"Have Watford considered Pink shorts?"