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BLIND, STUPID AND DESPERATE
 
00/01: Season preview:
Fulham: BSaD opinion

Word association*
Chelsea, "Fuggin" Al Fayed, High Road, May '98, "My Dad", Trafalgar Square, "What do you think?" and, finally, "The campaign of abuse that we instigated on BSaD a couple of years ago...and the cruel irony that we're both going out with women who claim to support them."

Previous encounters
The one that has to stand in the memory is the monstrous, huge, dizzying whirligig in May 1998. Sunshine, lager, singing, that monstrous terrace, Bristol City losing, Jason Lee's shot rolling with offensive indifference... was it really two years ago?

Less memorably, a rain-sodden Auto Windscreens Tie which my fiancée still cites as evidence of the Cottagers' eternal superiority over the Hornets and a home win early in Keegan's reign are the only recent encounters.

Last season
Paul Bracewell spoiled it, didn't he? Too decent a bloke, too sensible a choice of manager. The Cottagers finish ninth though, not nearly enough for their insane chairman. For one delicious afternoon it looked as if Ruud might take over. But that would have been too funny...

Next season
Fulham are ludicrous. The whole idea is as preposterous as it was two years ago in the days when Kev'n'Ray's travelling circus was a reliable source of amusement. Which other club has an in-detail listing of the rules of the game on its official site, in case the Chairman ever stops by (that's me banned from Harrods. Ho hum.)

Tsega's wide-eyed insistence that Fulham have "done ever so well" will undoubtedly develop into something a lot more triumphant should the Cottagers prevail this season. Upsettingly, under Tigana's management they could win the title by some margin. My life is over.

How to annoy a Fulham fan
Bemoan their lack of ambition.

* A unique experiment, featuring instant reactions from BSaD pundits to the mention of the club's name.